After coming home from the hospital with his health scare around 5 weeks old, things seemed pretty quiet, medically/illness-speaking. He had pretty continuous congestion, but we didn't think much of it, saying it was the winter sick season anyway.
Looking back, I think Heavenly Father was giving us a break with his health for a little while so we could focus on other things. At that time of a "break," we were not relaxing, for sure. Jonald (my husband) had interviewed for a new job while we were in the hospital when Kal was born, and he started that new job one day before Kal had been admitted into the hospital. His new job was much farther away from home than his previous one, so we had been house hunting. After a little while, we found what seemed to be the perfect house, and after wrestling with paperwork for the rest of the time, we were finally able to move in when Kal was about 10 weeks old.
Not even a week after moving into our new home, Kal had an ear infection. We had to drive back down to our old town to see his pediatrician during after-hours, since we had not found a new pediatrician in our town yet. My thoughts (Facebook post) at that point:
"Poor baby. He's stuck with a fever again, this time with an ear infection. Sick babies break my heart." -Elisha
With some antibiotics, his infection was all cleared up in a short time. On the last day of his antibiotics, he went to have his 2 month well-baby check up and to have his immunizations.
A few days later, a couple random bumps showed up in his neck area, along with a fever. Then a couple on his face, and then a couple more on his arm. After a few days, the rash had spread to his legs and eventually the top of his head and on to his chest. Kal seemed super achey during that first couple of weeks. At that point, I still had not found a new pediatrician in our new area, so with this rash, I ended up driving an hour down and an hour back, about two or three times a week, when the rash was at it's worst. At first, his doctor wasn't too concerned. Then, as the rashes spread, at every appointment, he would send us down to the lab to get loads of blood tests done. Nothing came back with an answer to his rashes, other than that his inflammatory levels and white blood cell counts were extremely high, which basically meant he had an infection of some sort. (Well, gee, thanks doc, I would've guessed that anyway by all the hundreds of bumps all over his body... haha).
That whole process of going back and forth so often to the doctor and having more and more lab tests was exhausting. There was one day that Kal screamed the entire hour down to the doctor. And no, I don't mean like the normal, "Wahh, wahh" cry or fussing. I mean the, "MOM! I AM SO ANGRY AT YOU AND THERE'S NOTHING THAT WILL MAKE ME CHANGE MY MIND (except maybe your boob, haha)-END OF THE WORLD" bloody-murder type of crying. Holy moly! All I could do was turn up the radio and try to block most of it out so I wouldn't end up in a car accident from my nerves reaching a breaking point.
I vowed then and there that when this rash would subside, I would find a new pediatrician MUCH closer to home. I just couldn't handle it all anymore.
Then the bills rolled in. OHHH the bills. Who knew that ONE LIST of blood tests could cost $4,000?! And might I mention, that was only from one time of blood tests. That didn't include the other days of blood tests and sick appointments that were involved with the whole process. Yeah, and that high deductible plan for our health insurance was really fun to meet. Haha, oh how naiive I was back then. I can't even imagine how people with higher deductible plans or worse health insurance even afford procedures more involved than blood tests. Luckily, we met our deductible in April with other doctor's visits that we don't have to second guess if we should run to the doctor at a moment's notice. Whoop whoop! You know, sometimes people tend to feel bad when I say we've met our deductible for the year already, but really, it's such a relief. And, with what Kal has now, at the first sign of illness, we need to let his doctor know. So, we're having fun racking up those doctor's bills that are being sent over to insurance to cover... Stick it to the MAN! Hahaha, no, but really.
Throughout those illnesses, Kal obviously went through quite a few crying sprees. I think, though, through those times that God has blessed me with selective hearing. As crazy as it might sound, I just came to a point where Kal would be screaming right in front of my face, and it was as though I couldn't hear it quite as loud as others could, or at least that I could just bear all the crying and stay calm most of the time. It was as through that strength Heavenly Father gave me was what probably kept me from going crazy most of the time and to stay strong for my kids, just to get through each new day. I was in survival mode- and I needed whatever help I could get to get out of bed every morning and try to love and have patience with my kids the best that I could.
But really, though those times, it was miraculous how, amongst all the crying, Kal would have moments of smiles that would just light up the room. He would light up my heavy, tired heart. There really is something about that cute smile of his. It is as though I can feel the strength and maturity of his soul- his Spirit, and it has a strange affect to calm me amidst stressful times.
"There
is no one perfect way to be a good mother... Each mother has different
challenges, different skills and abilities, and certainly different
children... What matters is that a mother loves her children deeply and,
in keeping with the devotion she has for God and her husband,
prioritizes them above all else." --Elder M. Russell Ballard
LOVE this.
LOVE this.
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